Having had probably the worst year in my short 44 years so far, I have decided to blog about the healing I will be doing, I hope to be doing anyway. 2010 was not the best of years but then it wasn't completely horrible either.
I am going to start by taking a 40 day walk with Christ. A friend of mine gave me this activity a few months back, it was really nice of her but I just wasn't ready to walk with someone I was pretty ticked off at. I mean he took my husband! I have been, what I feel is understandably irritated and angry not only at Him but my husband too. I will go into these feelings more later but suffice it to say there were some pretty rotten feelings there.
I am starting this blog the night before Christmas, why? Well it was to stay awake so I can talk to good ole Santa and help him with the gifts but my sweet 10 year old daughter is having a difficult time getting to sleep SO it will be a pretty long night.
I will give some background about me, I met and married my sweetheart in January of 1987, we traveled a little working but landed finally back home in Utah where we lived for a while and had our first Child a beautiful little girl. Time passed and we moved to Montana where the other 3 of our children were born, boy girl Boy. Work stopped so life got hard and we headed to Arizona for a time, we did not sell our home or rent it out. Arizona was an experience for sure, we go tired of the hustle and bustle and HEAT so in November of 2007 moved back home to Montana. This is when things got crazy. My husband could not find work but did now want to sell our home so he went back to Az for work and we played that game for a while till it got old. He came home to Montana but had a small bit of work in AZ for a family friend offered to him it was only for a couple weeks so he went.
It is true what they Say about the Ides of March bringing bad news. I got a phone call from my Brotherinlaw that My husband of 23 years had been diagnosed with stage four cancer and I needed to get to AZ as soon as I could. I flew out the next day.
Life changes when Cancer hits but this blog is not about Cancer though my experience with it was awful and hopeless as it was stage four melenoma cancer and had metastatized to his brain and lungs and well everywhere and we had NO idea he had it till it was to the end stages. It was just too late.
He died with me holding his hand and his two oldest children, Daughter 18 son 15 next to him, in Arizona at his brothers home. That was truly one of the hardest and most spiritual things I have ever experienced. I may talk about it later but not now.
In September, just a little less than 3 months later my father who was almost 94 suffered a massive hemorrhagic stroke and multiple ischemic strokes which took his life. To say I was devastated would be putting it mildly at the time but I got through it. It is apparently what I do, at least many people have told me how incredibly strong I am, Ha if they only knew.
So with that I bid you adieu for now. Christmas will come and go and I will Blog as the days go by.
Thank you who will read this. I hope it helps someone out there.
